Jiu Jitsu RainbowWe had a regular Jiu Jitsu rainbow in class today, which is what I call it when we have someone in class representing every rank in the belt progression from white to black.  It’s a beautiful sight to see.  It’s almost like a real rainbow, you know, if real rainbows could break your arm off and beat you with it.  Imagine skipping carelessly beneath a beautiful rainbow in a meadow and then having the rainbow crush you with suffocating weight until you can’t freaking breathe.  Yeah, it’s like that.

In other news, I learned a side control escape that involves digging your elbow violently into the neck of your opponent and I thought to myself, “Self, isn’t there a more personable way of escaping side control?” It might go like this:

“Pardon me, dear sir, but your top pressure is practically suffocating.  Might I bother you to raise up slightly so that I can abscond from this perilous situation?”

“Well, you seem like a decent chap.  I’ll tell you what…wiggle a little to the left and then thrust your wobbly bits and, Bob’s your uncle.  We’ll pretend like you earned it.”

“You’re a scholar and a gentleman.  Cheers.”

“Right-O.  Ready, set, go.”

If only the world were a little more civilized…..