Let’s see:

Frontal lobotomy, medieval torture, listen to an Obama speech, listen to a Romney speech, watch Jersey Shore, get a three hour MRI, be anally probed by aliens, eat tofu, take a twelve hour car ride with my kids, watch reruns of Little House on the Prairie.  You get the point right?

But alas, the one thing I must do today is go to the gym.  Motivation, where hast thou gone?

I ate at Panera for lunch.  I had a cup of broccoli cheddar soup and half a ham and swiss on Rye sammich.  So, that’s not exactly pigging out, but it’s not exactly clean either.  A step in the right direction, I think.  Some lady was eyeballing me the whole time.  She was like 85 years old and chewing very, very slowly while staring at me.  She had a half leaf of lettuce sticking out of the corner of her mouth, and with the weird skin hanging off of her neck, she kinda looked like a turtle from the shoulders up.  WTF is wrong with people?

I did manage to resist the urge to go all Juan Verde on her  (Juan Verde is my alter ego.  He’s quite unpredictable).  Now, I need to eat a freaking mini meal.  If I don’t I’ll pig out when dinner comes.  Seriously.  But if I do, I might be able to swing a chicken breast or something.