Frontal lobotomy, medieval torture, listen to an Obama speech, listen to a Romney speech, watch Jersey Shore, get a three hour MRI, be anally probed by aliens, eat tofu, take a twelve hour car ride with my kids, watch reruns of Little House on the Prairie. You get the point right?
But alas, the one thing I must do today is go to the gym. Motivation, where hast thou gone?
I ate at Panera for lunch. I had a cup of broccoli cheddar soup and half a ham and swiss on Rye sammich. So, that’s not exactly pigging out, but it’s not exactly clean either. A step in the right direction, I think. Some lady was eyeballing me the whole time. She was like 85 years old and chewing very, very slowly while staring at me. She had a half leaf of lettuce sticking out of the corner of her mouth, and with the weird skin hanging off of her neck, she kinda looked like a turtle from the shoulders up. WTF is wrong with people?
I did manage to resist the urge to go all Juan Verde on her (Juan Verde is my alter ego. He’s quite unpredictable). Now, I need to eat a freaking mini meal. If I don’t I’ll pig out when dinner comes. Seriously. But if I do, I might be able to swing a chicken breast or something.