So, day two of working out was almost as eventful as day 1. I spent 45 minutes on the elliptical trainer on “Cardio Masochist workout # 1.” The first thing I noticed upon starting my workout was that I felt as if I had been elephant stomped in the ankle during the night. Apparently when fat people work out, they are sore the next day. Go figure. So anyway, I was churning away on the maniac machine when I noticed something weird going on with my right knee.
As I would complete a stride and move my leg back to start another one, my right knee would shake a little. It reminded me of this pentecostal preacher I used to know who would shake at random in the pulpit for no discernible reason. I’m just giving you fair warning folks, I’m losing control of my bodily functions as a result of working out. First the knee. Who knows what comes next. You might want to think twice before getting on the machine next to me.
I thought about weighing myself on the way out of the gym, but there were two girls sitting at the desk near the scale. I couldn’t think of any way to get on the scale without embarrassing myself, so I decided to save that for tomorrow. I sucked in my gut a little and bowed up my chest as I walked out. Hopefully that will fool them until I actually get in shape.